So Easy A Cavebaby Can Do It!

I suspect that John and I are not the best role models when it comes to emulating proper language usage.  Given that three of our six children have had some type of language delay must reveal the fractures in our communication style.  Eventually they all express their needs and wants.  In fact, five of the six are speaking right now.  Unfortunately Max, the Thompson caboose, still prefers to communicate via cavemanese.  Why talk when a grunt will suffice?

Stancey never demonstrated any trouble communicating.  As a toddler, she belted out her first sentence while waiting in the bank drive-through.

“Come on, jackass!” She called from the back seat.  Not too much has changed in her style of expression over the years.

Like Stancey, Sam had few communication issues.  From the beginning he has had a wonderful talent for confessing family secrets as just a matter of fact.  Last weekend when my co-worker dropped by, he told her the X-rated name John had suggested calling our newfound kitten.  I blush just thinking about it. 

And Kenny has no shame when it comes to voicing his cerebral musings, and because he has no "inside voice" most of what he broadcasts is awkward.

“Mommy, can we stop walking for a minute so I can scratch my butt?”

This only makes me laugh because I remember my friend’s daughter saying to a mute two-year old Kenny, “Talk, stupid boy!”

Given what my kids say and when they say it, perhaps I should be grateful that Max isn’t yet verbal.  However, there has to be a better way of getting his needs met that doesn’t involve his intricate system of pinching and shrieking.  He’s a week away from being two and toddlers are supposed to talk.  I know all about Your Baby Can Read®.  Someone needs to develop a program called Your Baby Can Talk.

I feel like a communications failure.  It’s like Stancey said to John sometime after the bank episode.  “It just isn’t fair.  You try and you try, but you’re still a loser!”

Maybe Max finds it suspicious that I spend so much time encouraging him to talk only to turn around and tell his siblings to shut up. 

Still, I wait intently for what Max has to say.  Silence may be golden but for this mom it’s overrated.